- mom:are you ok?
- me:*has attack on titan flashbacks*
what i’d really like is for someone to objectively watch me for a week or so and then just sit down with me for a few hours and explain to me what i am like and how i look to others and what my personality is in detail and how i need to improve where do i sign up for that
So I was at a thrift store and I see this little cat lamp.
I was like “Aye yo, no homo, but ya’ll are fuckin’ adorable.”
So I bought the lil’ guy and took him home to plug him in.
Then I was like “No.”
Why is England so damp? The queen has reigned there for years.
What did Mason say to Dixon? We’ve got to draw the line here.
Who built the ark? I have Noah idea.
Why did the ghost of Anne Boleyn always run after Henry? She was trying to get ahead.
How did the Vikings send secret messages? By Norse code.
How did the Roman cut his hair? He used some Caesers.